Re: no, really, it's an addiction
I enjoyed dr molly tov's post no, really, it's an addiction and it gave me some hope, too.
It reminds me of the time my boyfriend caught me reflexively "tapping" my notebook on the table, in the same way I'd do to my phone screen, just because it's a small rectangular object lying there in the corner of my vision (embarrassing).
I makes me think about the thing I don't want to acknowledge, that I can't sleep without my phone. Well, more that I can't face insomnia without my phone. Things inevitably feel very bleak in the middle of the night and I'm often overwhelmed by my thoughts and feelings, which are kept at bay by squardle or worse, browsing instagram reels.
(I let myself do this because it's better than entering some sort of hopelessness spiral, and I try not to be too hard on myself because it is better to watch asmr videos than feel wretched. But the eventual goal is good sleep, consistently or at least more regularly, and I want to work towards that. But if you're also in a phone addiction, be kind to yourself!)
I'm not sure I can face 3am without it, but it's hopeful to know other people are out there trying (and succeeding) to break the addiction. It makes me feel I might be able to work towards it too.